The Heart of Recovery: How Compassion and Community Offer Hope in the Wake of Addiction by Deborah and David Beddoe:

This is  probably my last book review of the year; The Heart of Recovery: How Compassion and Community Offer Hope in the Wake of Addiction by Deborah and David Beddoe:

As a member of THE SUBSTANCE ABUSE COMMUNITY FORCE in Volusia County, I’m very happy to find such an in-depth book on the subject of addiction. Yes, it takes a community to help bring sanity back into lives that have gone long astray.

I loved what Dave said in Chapter Two, Reviving Compassion, “In its simplest form, recovery is a return to health.” He went on to say, “RECOVERY TAKES TIME.”

“People don’t get into addiction overnight. It can happen through a series of poor choices, or it can happen through a series of legal prescriptions, or both. It took time to dig the hole and it will take time to get out. The damage you’ve done in your addiction doesn’t go away when you stop using. It takes time to mend relationships, rebuild homes and careers. It takes time to form new habits and to put into practice new ways of coping with stress or grief. It takes time to recognize and process underlying issues. It takes time to regain trust---and to trust. And it takes time to get back on your feet financially. Recovery is learning how to live without the drug or drink that has helped you get by for so long at the same time as you are trying to build a healthier life.”

Deborah writes from the position of the mate, who is supportive, yet going through the pain also, the dilemma of a marriage that didn’t turn out to be what she’d signed up for. She talks about it getting worse before it got better. She prayed the prayer that many mates, parents and other loved ones end up praying, the prayer of surrender. In her own words, “I finally set everything out before God; Do your will, whatever it takes to heal him. And I prayed, God if he’s using, don’t let him get away with it. And then I let go.”

As a family member of loved ones with addictions, I’ve sometimes prayed that prayer of surrender daily, putting my loved ones on the altar of God. And yes, that there is a spiritual component to recovery is major for me, and it is stressed in this book. They portray Christians who are not perfect but who keep trying.

There is a wealth of resources mentioned and something I’ve never seen before, but loved, A TENTATIVE CHART OF ALCOHOL ADDICTION AND RECOVERY.

I received this book free of charge from Revell Reads in exchange for my honest review.

https://www.amazon.com/Heart-Recovery-Compassion-Community-Addiction/dp/0800736559/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8

A Powerful Prayer adapted from Tommy, an inmate

This prayer was sent to me created by Tommy Billey, a child of God from Shonda Savage Wentworth's website; I immediately felt that it was so powerful and could be adapted for other things that people pray for. So, here’s my version, with permission given to me to edit it for my needs:

Adapted from Shonda’s blog by Tommy, an inmate

My rewrite~ ~ ~

Dear Rebellion, Drugs, Alcoholism and Disrespect,

Spirit of lawlessness and family curses and Spirit of Incarceration,

Have you not learned your lesson, yet? You are a defeated enemy of mine. You have absolutely no chance of being successful in my family. Why you continue to return and harass me, time and time again, I’ll never understand. Maybe your father, the devil himself, has convinced you that you can win. But he is a liar, and you, rebellion and disrespect are just a product of that lie.

You call yourself strong but even that is a lie. I know this because the real Big C resides in my heart. Yes, He is the Christ, the Messiah, the Keeper of my soul. He is life. You are death. But where life dwells, death has no place.

So bring on your little attacks, I’ll gladly sustain whatever it brings, because in the end, when my God sends you back to the depths of hell, I’ll be the one to rise in victory and give all glory to the One who defeats you—my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

By the way rebellion, how do you like all those prayers going up to God for me? Oh, you thought I was alone. How foolish of you. Did your father, the devil, tell you that, too? I told you he’s a liar. You see, when you attack one of us, you take on us all. We are the body of Christ Jesus. We are Somebody’s Mother.

Now, I’ll be fair and give you credit for your small victories. Yeah, you knocked me down. You had me heartsick beyond my wildest dreams, and at times you made me want to quit. But like the psalmist, David, I had to encourage myself in the Lord. And when I began to follow Paul’s advice in Romans 5:3-4 and glory in my tribulation, I was indeed encouraged, and my spirit was refreshed.

Oh, I’m so sorry, I forgot you don’t like the Holy Scriptures quoted to you. I could tell it affected you each time I quoted those healing Scriptures. I know this because your presence has decreased with each day. Now I find out you can’t be seen at all. Poor you! Nowhere in this family to call home.

By the power of Jesus name, I reject you. And where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom! Freedom from your deceitful grasp. Return to hell where you whence came. Tell satan he’s failed once again. So long satan, you are history!

Without regards,

Somebody’s Mother

Adapted from Shonda’s blog by an inmate whose name is Tommy Billey

https://fortressofhopeministries.com/2019/11/07/so-long-cancer-youre-history/?fbclid=IwAR2_QpTrBbw5elpNlqVXTUAaVawBLSh1oECCtYFC9aJ2SHuvqGrt5rdAl8k

A SISTER AMONG YOU https://thornrose7.blogspot.com/

Jesus and Support Groups, a Match Made in Heaven

Jesus and Support Groups, a Match Made in Heaven

It seems some people tend to look down upon people who go to support groups like Al-Anon, Alcoholics Anonymous, or Celebrate Recovery. Some of them perhaps feel like if you have the Lord, you should be able to cope with anything that life hits you with. That includes if there is an addict in the family.

     When I accepted Jesus as savior, I knew I had all I needed for life and living in this world. But I also go to Al-Anon and completed a course in Celebrate Recovery. Why? You might wonder.

     Some of us need a little help with focusing on things that will keep them sane in this world. The 12-step support group does this for me along with my daily Bible devotions and prayer, which is my first priority each day. I find when I have something to focus on and good things to put into my mind, I’m more likely to have a good day. Sometimes our days are filled with thinking about our dysfunctional family members, their illness, their addictions and the possible consequences they (and we as their loved ones) may pay. 

            I’d like to introduce you to the 12 Steps of Al-Anon (a group of people who are bothered by someone else’s drinking.)

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.

            Realizing that we are powerless over other people and that their lives cannot be changed by us; we learn the powerlessness that comes from yielding to step one. We are powerless but our God, Jesus, is all powerful. When we let the addict or alcoholic continually control our minds and thoughts, we’re not taking good care of ourselves. Our lives become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Does the dysfunction in your life ever make you feel like you are going insane? You have joined the club of mothers, parents or family members of addicts then. It’s a growing club with no dues except the debt of love. Only the Lord our God can restore us and our loved ones back to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

We, as well, as the addicts in our lives have to make decisions, sometimes daily, to let go and let God. In that we turn each situation in our life over to God. We didn’t create, can’t change and can’t control anyone or any circumstance but our Lord can and He will at the right time.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

There are many workbooks and online helps to help us do this step. Mainly I think it is looking at our past, our character traits both good and bad and admitting we need help to be able to live with others.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

After we have seen ourselves for what we are, just a flawed but loved human being, we admit to our Lord, to ourselves and then find a friend or a sponsor to admit the things we feel led to expose. When we do, miracle upon miracle, we find, we are not condemned. We find that we are affirmed, loved and encouraged.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

The Lord forgives! How wonderful an experience to know that He knows our defects, our shortcomings and yet, he loves us still and doesn’t want us to remain in them.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Step seven is probably the easiest of the steps to work because if I humble myself before God, He has promised to lift me up. His death on the cross guaranteed my forgiveness, so I come to Him knowing He is going to answer my cry for help.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

This goes along with the verse if you bring your gift to the altar and then remember your brother has ought with you, leave your gift and go make it right with your brother, sister, husband, wife, child or friend.

9. Made a direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Sometimes this step has seemed to be a cop-out to me; direct amends unless it might hurt someone, perhaps in bringing up the bad memories?

I remember some years back before I was as knowledgeable about how long it could take to work the steps. I was stressed at a situation and found myself yelling, “Step Eight, Step Eight, Step Eight!” I was so focused on how I felt slighted, that I didn’t even know the right step to say. Step Eight says become willing, Step Nine, says to actually make the amends.

I’d so thought someone was overdue to make amends for the things that they had done to me, not realizing by me even bringing up some of it, the results might lead to more disagreement and disharmony. Life is too short to expect anything from anyone. I try to count my blessings and realize that we may have it bad but there is always someone worse off.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

I do think being prompt with forgiveness and amends is the right way to live when we have the strength and courage and love to live in that manner. It’s sometimes said, “Clean up your own side of the road.” When we do this, we really don’t have time to be wondering about the other side of the road.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Begin each day with a prayer of asking God to be with us, guide us, live and shine from us and help us to be a part of bringing His perfect will for our lives.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

I love the attraction of a life well-lived to carry the message. A life where joy is shown, a life where we have order, clarity and love abounding. This kind of life only comes from a spiritual awakening; it’s truly divine in nature. To God be the glory! I’ll always believe that Jesus and support groups are a match made in heaven.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGLxXYYwO90

Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps, copyright 1996 by Al-Anon Family Group

Headquarters, Inc. Reprinted with permission of Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.

HE CAN MAKE YOU GLAD!

Sometimes, I go back and reread things that I wrote that shows me where I was at a certain season or timeframe of life, or helps me to press on. This is part of a 2010 message with a verse that has given me much encouragement.

Oh, satisfy us early with Your mercy,
That we may rejoice and be glad all our days!
Make us glad according to the days in which You have afflicted us,
The years in which we have seen evil.
Psalm 90:14-15 (New King James Version)

I love these verses in Psalm 90, I was so astounded that the Lord would actually take the days of pain and affliction that we have gone through and make us happy according to them.

Is it possible that He would give joy as He allowed sorrow? Isn't that the premise of Romans 8:28 when it is said that He will work all things to our good? He can make us glad! He not only makes us glad but in proportion to how much we’ve been afflicted with pain and suffering.

What encouraging words and what a wonderful prayer to pray; make us glad according to the days wherein thou hast afflicted us, and the years wherein we have seen evil. (ASV)

Oh that the Lord would fill us with love and joy as we seek Him in the morning. It truly would give us a song to sing and a story to tell to our families and friends. How many of us want to proclaim His greatness to our children and grandchildren? Most of us do and we can by reminding them of these precious words from the Psalms.

It’s okay to ask the Lord to treat us well and give us success. In my life I have felt afflicted with abuses, hurt and losses but I can prevail by focusing on the good that will come eventually. If I had not endured these things, I would not be the person I am today. I was on the road to being a spoiled brat as a young girl and then my world was rocked by pain and I learned to look outside of myself.

 I learned that others are more important than myself, early on. I learned about self-sacrifice from a mother who worked so many hours a week at forty-five cents an hour for years just to feed her children as my sweet Mama did. I learned that my brothers and sister were overcomers in life, as they just did what they could to enjoy what little we had. We all learned that we had a lot more than many others. We learned to share what we had and that it is not material things that count but strength, maturity and kindness that will prevail all the days the Lord gives us. We learned family and friends are more important than having a perfect life.

I know my message may be different than most people's, but I guess the slant He gives me fits some families. You know: the dysfunctional, but trying ones, the funny, but forgiven ones, and the once hopeless but now Hope-filled ones! To God be the Glory! Affliction to gladness; it's the way of the Cross and the way our own Savior took. I believe it is the answer to the question that I ask often of the Lord; “Show me how to live?” This day and every day satisfy us early with Your mercy,

That we may rejoice and be glad all our days!

Donna Collins Tinsley

Two songs concerning gladness: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LqkW19B0d3g

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytE8um04l24

Display Windows

“Beware how you take away hope from another human being.”

Oliver Wendell Holmes

The Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered and reflected on My servant Job? For there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God [with reverence] and abstains from and turns away from evil [because he honors God].” ⁹ Then Satan answered the Lord, “Does Job fear God for nothing? ¹⁰ Have You not put a hedge [of protection] around him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands [and conferred prosperity and happiness upon him], and his possessions have increased in the land. ¹¹ But put forth Your hand now and touch (destroy) all that he has, and he will surely curse You to Your face.”

I heard a sermon about the book of Job that explained the verse, “The LORD said to Satan, “Have you considered and reflected on My servant Job? For there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God [with reverence] and abstains from and turns away from evil [because he honors God].”

It went on to say that the Lord put Job under the spotlight or on display, as a man of integrity who would not turn away from God because of personal pain and trauma. He had a lot of that. He lost EVERYTHING right down to ALL his children. And I feel for his wife, whose main quote was “Curse God and die!” We sometimes forget that she is going through this with him, feeling his pain, losing her children, too. She was probably beyond bewildered at their life.

I want to focus on being in the spotlight. I’ve told some of my children and grandchildren, that they are in the spotlight. They may have not asked to be or wanted to be, but their lives are, good or bad. If things aren’t going well at the moment the Lord may want to spotlight how HE CAN MAKE GOOD FROM BAD. That goes along with the scripture in Romans 8:28 where we read that God will make all things work together for our good because of being called by Him.



The definition of display means to show, exhibit, display, expose, parade, flaunt mean to present so as to invite notice or attention; stresses putting forward prominently or openly.

The definition of spotlight means a projected spot of light used to illuminate brilliantly a person, object, or group on a stage; public notice or attention. a light designed to direct a narrow intense beam of light on a small area, something that illuminates brilliantly.



Many of us hate to be in the spotlight, especially when we proclaim the Word of the Lord over our families and instead of a shining example of good things, it seems that things are going from bad to worse. FOR THIS WE HAVE JESUS! And we’re not giving up on Him, as the apostles said, “Where can we go, You have the words of life?” When our family’s lives seems messed up, we definitely don’t want to be on display. But on the other hand, when you shop and something is on display, it can be a beautiful thing. Years ago, as a little girl, I remember beautiful display windows with only the best things featured. Walking downtown near Christmas there would be such display windows, that it would take your breath away.

May I say it’s possible that the Lord may want to brilliantly illuminate and bring attention to what He wants to do with your life. It’s all a matter of giving yourself over to Him and His purposes. I can think of several women right now, that the Lord has displayed, from tragedy to triumph, their lives a miracle. As I think of these sisters among us, I have hope. I press on. I pray through. Be a hope hustler today. Your life is on display.

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL! But MERCY IS EVEN MORE REAL!

I hesitated to share this honor but also wanted to remind everyone that the struggle is real and continues for families. I have in no way arrived and also on the totem pole of people doing great things in our community, I’d probably be at the bottom.

On the very week of this honor some of the greatest pain continues in our family with situations that would be totally unbearable without the Lord. Sometimes I’m amazed at how low someone’s bottom must get. I’m equally amazed at the grace of our Lord.  Something that is on my heart is concerning yielding to the Lord. Sometimes we, as humans, hold on so tight to the very thing that is hindering the blessing of the Lord. I’ve always said that I don’t want to be clenching my hands closed, so that the Lord has to rip things from me, but I open my hands up each day and release those things to Him. I put those I love on His altar and try to release to His plan their lives. He sees so much clearer than I do. I can’t figure it out, but He already has.

So I share this as part of my journey and that you may know me better. Also, that you would know that you what do matters. You are unique and have unique offerings to give to the world. Shine on.

From the Facebook page for Volusia Recovery Alliance

October 4 at 7:15 AM · 

It's that day again where we celebrate Local Recovery Heroes, including Allies and Family Members.
We are so grateful for today's Hero and thank her for all the work she's done to help our community and so much more!
Please help us celebrate Donna!!

What is your name and how long have you been involved in the Recovery Community?

Hi, I’m Donna Collins Tinsley and I became involved with the Recovery Community on a personal note when I attended an Al-Anon meeting over eleven years ago. The only reason I went there was because, after years of watching my beautiful daughter self-destruct, I did the only thing I thought I could do; I Marchman Acted her.* To be able to visit her at treatment I had to attend Al-anon and get someone to sign a paper for each visit. After the first visit to the Gentle Journey Group, I knew I wanted to go back for “me” whether I visited her or not. “Keep coming back” and “It works if you work it,” were slogans that became part of my life.

What inspired you to become involved in the Recovery Community?

I really wanted to educate myself and become part of the solution and not part of the problem. There wasn’t as much help available back then and a lot of stigma to families and within families. I always thought, this is “Somebody’s daughter, son or family member.” What if it were yours? Wouldn’t you want someone to care about them and not look down upon them? As a mother, I also wanted to help ease the load of hurting moms and children. The pain is real but the healing can be just as real, if we embrace recovery. My daughter was 41 at the time I Marchman Acted her and although she’d been in and out of treatment a few times, she wasn’t able to stay clean. Her lifestyle had stolen the joy of life and family from her. I think by this time we were both desperate! What I didn’t know at the time was the Marchman Act spelled love to her. A conversation we’d had on the phone, beforehand, went like this,
“You need to go into a drug treatment program!”
“Mom, you could always “Marchman Act” me,” she replied.

Although I thought at her age, she should be doing it herself, I didn’t realize that she thought no one loved her enough to do it. That was not true, I was just torn between detaching and letting natural consequences come about and doing what I wanted to do, as a mom.

By the time she was served the papers, she decided she didn’t like the idea of me doing it. But I decided to follow through as in the Serenity Prayer, “Accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can.” A friend in Recovery says, “Do what you can live with.” (John H.) Some days I can live with detachment, other days not. Some days I may offer a ride, or help in some form. Other days, I may have a check in my heart about helping. She since has embraced recovery and has been working a program, and serving the Recovery Community also. We now have several family members in recovery. Yet as one child got better, another one started down the slippery slope of pain. I didn’t even see it coming as I was too focused on the addict. The struggle is real for families.

What has being involved in the Recovery Community taught you about yourself?

The Recovery Community has taught me that it’s a family disease and we ALL need help. Recovery teaches that we who are affected by addiction are also sick, and keeping secrets keeps us sicker. It has taught me that we need the help of a loving God to help restore our insane lives back to sanity. For me, Jesus and recovery groups are what gets me through the day. And the long nights.

"Addiction is an equal opportunity destroyer" was the most profound quote written by Joe Herzanek in "Why Don't They Just Quit?" If you are a parent of an addict you will relate to that quote. But Recovery also taught me that I can’t “fix” anyone but myself and to “Mind My Own Business.” That’s a hard one for me but I’m learning to make quick amends if I get off the path. I love the Al-anon slogans and certain devotionals that enhance my recovery walk. It’s taught me to have compassion and reminds me that there is HOPE!

What ways have you found to be of service in the Recovery Community?

I’m honored to be a very small part of the Recovery Community and feel that there are SO MANY other people doing so much more than I do. One of the first things I did was create a Facebook page to pray for mothers and their loved ones, called Somebody’s Mother Online Prayer Support Group. If substance use disorder in any form has hit your family you need to know that someone is holding you up in prayer. It is a closed page, so the public can’t see the prayer requests. We’ve had some victories as well as losses, but together we are strong.

I’ve attended Al-anon events and seminars and serve as secretary for my home group right now. I help as one of the administrators on the Substance Abuse Community Force and try to keep Recovery topics there online. I try to encourage people of faith to join with us on this journey. I blog to encourage people to press on. I hope one day to do more service work, but since life gets in the way of living sometimes, I’m just doing what I can. I want it to be said of me when I die, “She lived well and she loved well.” Love never fails.
Let your light shine, people! Recovery is alive and well in our area!

*THE MARCHMAN ACT: The Marchman Act is a Florida statute that is also known as the "Hal S. Marchman Alcohol and Other Drug Services Act of 1993" and simply referred by its abbreviated name "The Marchman Act". It provides a means of involuntary and voluntary assessment & stabilization and treatment of a person allegedly abusing alcohol or drugs.

#NationalRecoverymovement #VolusiaRecoveryAlliance #Volusiarecovers #Community #Recovery #RecoveryCommunityHero #FacesandVoicesofRecovery

https://thornrose7.blogspot.com/2014/02/thank-you-beth-patch-and-cbn.html

WHEN GOD'S PROMISES AND REAL LIFE COLLIDE

I started this particular blog in July and life got in the way of posting. Today it seems even more relevant than then. Real life has been hard recently. FOR THIS WE HAVE JESUS!

When God’s Promises and Real Life Collide

Behold, the Lord has proclaimed to the end of the earth,

Say to the daughter of Zion, “Lo, your salvation comes;

Behold His reward is with Him, and His recompense before Him.”

And they will call them, “The holy people,

The redeemed of the Lord”;

And you will be called, “Sought out, a city not forsaken.” Isaiah 62:11-12

My best advice to people has always been, “Find a Bible verse, make it your own and hang on to it.” My next advice would be to pray. Pray when you’re happy, pray when you’re sad, pray when you think you can’t put one foot in front of the other to go on. Yet many times, if you’re like me, you may feel bad when the advice you give to people doesn’t seem like it’s working. Perhaps God has disappointed you; your prayers don’t seem to be answered. Is it wrong to feel disappointed with God? Philip Yancey wrote a whole book on the subject. It concerns many stories of real people going through literal “hell on earth” and realistically examines their plights and questions.

“Then you will know that I am the LORD; those who hope in me will not be disappointed." Isaiah 49:23  

For the Christian there are no guarantees on the outcome of a situation. As noted in Hebrews 11 the great faith chapter we don’t all see the conclusion of the things God has planted in our hearts. But we can still look with hope for the promise.

If it costs you nothing, it's worth nothing! Endurance is the

price tag of achievement. Listen, "We pray that you'll have

the strength...not the grim strength of gritting your teeth

but the...strength God gives...that endures the unendurable

and spills over into joy" (Col 1:11 TM)

          Yet even as I write this word of encouragement, I know that many of you have lost hope in perhaps your child who’s gone astray, in your life or even in your future. It is hard to hope in what you cannot see. But just take it a step at a time, a day at a time, even a moment at a time. Pray for the strength to just do the next thing that needs to be done. It may have nothing to do with the child that has gone astray or the life issue that is bothering you. The next thing you may need to do is learn to take care of yourself.

          You may have beat yourself up with guilt over the things you think you should’ve done or could’ve done that you are walking weary and wounded. Learn to be good to yourself. Treat yourself well. The commandment about loving your neighbor as you love yourself applies here. You would be kind to a neighbor, so kindly take care of yourself and those that are right before you. Try to do something each day for someone else that you don’t take credit for. That sort of living sows seeds of love and kindness that will return to you.

          There are some of you in whom the Lord would say, “the world was not worthy of them.” He would say to you that He has seen your walk of faith through the pain of living in this world. He knows you are not perfect in your endeavors but He also knows you have tried. He knows you love your child, and you, His child, are loved with an everlasting love by Him. He sees the big picture that we cannot see. He loves your child more than you can ever imagine although as a parent yourself, you feel that no one could match the love you feel. He will draw a hurting parent close. He does not forget your labor of love towards your child and to Him, your heavenly Father. Continue to hold on to His promises to you until they collide into your life.

The Words between Us by Erin Bartels goes from now to then and back again.

The Words between Us by Erin Bartels goes from now to then and back again. She is a master at crafting word scenes and beauty in prose. Although I felt it to be a bit slow at the beginning, it became a mystery part of the way through which surprised me and kept me reading.


The description of Robin seeing Niagara for the first time, midway through the book made me wake up to the beauty of Erin’s writing. “The sun was hanging low in the sky when we reached Niagara, and I had to shade my eyes. I felt the falls before I saw them, a low and thundering in my ears and a shivering beneath my feet, like the entire world was trembling…it felt like a release.”


The feelings a teenager goes through when they feel abandoned were sensitively presented and the subjects of justice and reconciliation were addressed also.


Book-talk, poetry and suspense are found in this novel. I look forward to reading more from Erin Bartels.



I received this book free of charge from Revell Reads in exchange for my honest review.

Donna Collins Tinsley

This and That about Recovery Books

Today when I was reading Pam Lanhart’s devotional book, PRAYING OUR LOVED ONE HOME, the page titled, DRINK DEEPLY had a beautiful story of healing and redemption. The phrase she used that struck me was “sober and totally wrecked for Jesus.” How many of us are still praying for that miracle, the one where your loved one is sober and totally wrecked or sold out for Jesus and serving Him with their whole heart? I can tell you it’s a daily prayer for many a mother or grandmother. So many times, when I’m reading Pam’s or Sandy Swenson’s books, I want to take a picture of whole pages and post them. Because I understand an author’s copyright, I try to restrain myself and just use a quote here or there. I’m always grateful to find a post from them or another recovery-minded person to share. I recently blogged about several books that help me through the day, of course the chief one being the WORD OF THE LORD, my Bible.



So, today, since I wasn’t able to get to my home group meeting on Thursday as Aryel was still home from school, I’m hitting a meeting. Hoping to find some new serenity, strength and hope along the way.



I’m leaving you with two quotes from TENDING DANDELIONS:



“I will never give up on you. I know you must walk your own path, in your own time, to seek recovery. So, for now I will do the only thing I can: love you.”



“Grant me the serenity to accept the one I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can and the wisdom to know it’s me.”



https://thornrose7.blogspot.com/2019/04/blogging-about-books-today.html



Perhaps you have a favorite Recovery book you’d like to share with others?

What you say can mean life or death. SPEAK LIFE!

This week was very hectic and exhausting yet fulfilling on so many levels. Please continue to pray for Aryel as even elementary school can be full of drama and very hard. Praising the Lord that she is coming down on her Prednisone, but she still is on a high level for every day use. I pray that one day she will be free of Autoimmune Hepatitis and able to have a calm, happy life.



I got through some labs and X-rays and am praying that if anything is found, it will be something minor. “

"Every flower, even the fairest, has its shadow beneath it as it basks in the sunlight."

Where there is much light there is also much shade.” From Streams in the Desert.



The highlight of my week came yesterday when a childhood friend of Regina's texted me and said,


“I always have been very thankful for you starting my foundation with the Lord as a child. Thank you for being here for me now.” I was deeply moved and honored by her words. I had no idea that she would think that of me, but I’m entirely grateful to the Lord. It was balm to my soul.





I am a word person, starting with THE WORD OF THE LIVING GOD. People, you never know when your words will encourage someone at just the right time. Your kind words may help someone who is going through pain or unimaginable family drama.




What you say can mean life or death.


    Those who speak with care will be rewarded. Proverbs 18:21 New Century Version (NCV)





Streams in the Desert

I have all, and abound (Phil. 4:18).

In one of my garden books there is a chapter with a very interesting heading, "Flowers that Grow in the Gloom." It deals with those patches in a garden which never catch the sunlight. And my guide tells me the sort of flowers which are not afraid of these dingy corners--may rather like them and flourish in them.

And there are similar things in the world of the spirit. They come out when material circumstances become stern and severe. They grow in the gloom. How can we otherwise explain some of the experiences of the Apostle Paul?

Here he is in captivity at Rome. The supreme mission of his life appears to be broken. But it is just in this besetting dinginess that flowers begin to show their faces in bright and fascinating glory. He may have seen them before, growing in the open road, but never as they now appeared in incomparable strength and beauty. Words of promise opened out their treasures as he had never seen them before.

Among those treasures were such wonderful things as the grace of Christ, the love of Christ, the joy and peace of Christ; and it seemed as though they needed an "encircling gloom" to draw out their secret and their inner glory. At any rate the realm of gloom became the home of revelation, and Paul began to realize as never before the range and wealth of his spiritual inheritance.

Who has not known men and women who, when they arrive at seasons of gloom and solitude, put on strength and hopefulness like a robe? You may imprison such folk where you please; but you shut up their treasure with them. You cannot shut it out. You may make their material lot a desert, but "the wilderness and the solitary place shall be glad, and the desert shall rejoice and blossom as the rose."--Dr. Jowett

"Every flower, even the fairest, has its shadow beneath it as it basks in the sunlight."

Where there is much light there is also much shade.

The Good, Upscale Doctor Repost

The Good, Upscale Doctor

"18-year-old son died of overdose, Grieving mother pushing Oxy ban, 


RX for trouble: Painkiller abuse plagues society, Falling short in fighting addiction," these all were either headlines or editorials recently in our local newspaper. They say in the State of Florida seven people die daily from overdoses of prescription meds.



Until it hits home in your own family, headlines like these will not affect you. It will be somebody else's child, not your own; it doesn't affect you. You can put down people like that, thinking they may be the scum of the earth, not even realizing that some of those children started off like your own kids. Just living their life, going to school, thinking about college and their careers. Then the tragedy of addiction hits the family.



 It may have been a legitimate pain issue, they may have had surgeries young and pain issues that seemed beyond control. You as a parent may have questioned the expensive upscale doctor, voicing aloud to him your concerns. "Why such high pain killers so soon? Aren't morphine patches something given to hospice patients? Will my child still need these medications if they have surgery?"



He immediately tried to pacify you, "It isn't addictive, and it is something they can take their whole life through if necessary."



You weren't convinced, yet who were you? Did you have as many degrees as this doctor? Isn't he noted in the community for his work? Didn't he say he’d do the same treatment for his own daughter or son if in your shoes? It wasn't long before the teen that was in pain was of legal age to continue with the doctor without your consent. And sooner than later the things you were concerned with came about. That is why we have painkiller abuse in our society. I don't have to name names; there are legions in our State and country that were writing prescriptions at that time, with no concern for the long-term outcome, which in most cases was addiction.  



Prescription medicine addiction is a real dilemma in our society and it isn't getting any easier to decide who is right and who is wrong. Of course, I can understand when someone is in dire need of medications that they shouldn't be denied. I am not against doctors who truly must help those who suffer with chronic pain; I am all for good medical care. Yet the utmost scrutiny should be given to doctors that write painkiller prescriptions, too many, too soon. Look at the recent celebrity deaths and the doctors that were a part of each one! We have become such a drugged-up nation; sometimes I wonder if anyone knows real people anymore or are they just someone either doped up or a facade of that person you used to know and love?



Addiction itself has been described as cunning, baffling, and powerful by AA and Al-Anon groups. That means to me that the person becomes so cunning in taking care of their addiction that it is second nature to them to use any form of manipulation to get their source of relief. It baffles the ordinary person to find this such a powerful influence in our loved one. The person you once knew and loved seems to be gone from you forever and you can only hand the problem over to a loving God who alone can bring help for the true pain; the pain that painkillers will never cover.



Try not to judge harshly; statistics say addiction hits all families and social-economic groups before long.  You wouldn't want to walk a mile in the shoes or the grieving mother or father, rehash in your mind what you could've or should've done, or be in the body of the addict who became addicted following doctor's orders. And then we have the issues of people being released from the hospital or mental health wards, who have been on high doses of medications that they are unable to continue on without several appointments at the  psychiatrist’s office; their body may be jerking with tremors, but they can't get in right away for medications. It's all a sad dilemma. 



Yes, the good, upscale expensive doctor is of no help now. Only the healing hand of the Great Physician can have mercy on this kind of hurt.

We go to the Word of God for help and comfort.

  Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
   for his compassions never fail.
 They are new every morning;
   great is your faithfulness.
 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
   therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:22-24 (New International Version, ©2010)

I see in this verse that God truly started the “One day at a time” movement long before Bill W. came up with it. We wait on His compassions and healing for our families! 

 Another version that might help:



 I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,
   the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.
I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—
   the feeling of hitting the bottom.
But there's one other thing I remember,
   and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:

 God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
   his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
   How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
   He's all I've got left.

 God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,
   to the woman who diligently seeks.
It's a good thing to quietly hope,
   quietly hope for help from God.
It's a good thing when you're young
   to stick it out through the hard times.

When life is heavy and hard to take,
   go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don't ask questions:
   Wait for hope to appear.
Don't run from trouble. Take it full-face.
   The "worst" is never the worst.

 Why? Because the Master won't ever
   walk out and fail to return.

Lamentations 3:19-33 (The Message)

We have a faithful God to whom we can trust our family’s problems and issues.