The Good, Upscale Doctor

I believe this story is one that many mothers and fathers will relate to, and I dedicate it to the good work by Barbara Theodosiou founder of The Addict's Mom and her wonderful team, Somebody's Mother online Prayer Support Group and the Substance Abuse Community Force.

The Good, Upscale Doctor

The Good, Upscale Doctor

"18-year-old son died of overdose, Grieving mother pushing Oxy ban,

RX for trouble: Painkiller abuse plagues society, Falling short in fighting addiction," these all were either headlines or editorials recently in our local newspaper. They say in the State of Florida seven people die daily from overdoses of prescription meds.



Until it hits home in your own family, headlines like these will not affect you. It will be somebody else's child, not your own; it doesn't affect you. You can put down people like that, thinking they may be the scum of the earth, not even realizing that some of those children started off like your own kids. Just living their life, going to school, thinking about college and their careers. Then the tragedy of addiction hits the family.



 It may have been a legitimate pain issue, they may have had surgeries young and pain issues that seemed beyond control. You as a parent may have questioned the expensive upscale doctor, voicing aloud to him your concerns. "Why such high pain killers so soon? Aren't morphine patches something given to hospice patients? Will my child still need these medications if they have surgery?"



He immediately tried to pacify you, "It isn't addictive, and it is something they can take their whole life through if necessary."



You weren't convinced, yet who were you? Did you have as many degrees as this doctor? Isn't he noted in the community for his work? Didn't he say he’d do the same treatment for his own daughter or son if in your shoes? It wasn't long before the teen that was in pain was of legal age to continue with the doctor without your consent. And sooner than later the things you were concerned with came about. That is why we have painkiller abuse in our society. I don't have to name names; there are legions in our State and country that were writing prescriptions at that time, with no concern for the long-term outcome, which in most cases was addiction.  



Prescription medicine addiction is a real dilemma in our society and it isn't getting any easier to decide who is right and who is wrong. Of course, I can understand when someone is in dire need of medications that they shouldn't be denied. I am not against doctors who truly must help those who suffer with chronic pain; I am all for good medical care. Yet the utmost scrutiny should be given to doctors that write painkiller prescriptions, too many, too soon. Look at the recent celebrity deaths and the doctors that were a part of each one! We have become such a drugged-up nation; sometimes I wonder if anyone knows real people anymore or are they just someone either doped up or a facade of that person you used to know and love?



Addiction itself has been described as cunning, baffling, and powerful by AA and Al-Anon groups. That means to me that the person becomes so cunning in taking care of their addiction that it is second nature to them to use any form of manipulation to get their source of relief. It baffles the ordinary person to find this such a powerful influence in our loved one. The person you once knew and loved seems to be gone from you forever and you can only hand the problem over to a loving God who alone can bring help for the true pain; the pain that painkillers will never cover.



Try not to judge harshly; statistics say addiction hits all families and social-economic groups before long.  You wouldn't want to walk a mile in the shoes or the grieving mother or father, rehash in your mind what you could've or should've done, or be in the body of the addict who became addicted following doctor's orders. Yes, the good, upscale expensive doctor is of no help now. Only the healing hand of the Great Physician can have mercy on this kind of hurt.

We go to the Word of God for help and comfort.

  Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
   for his compassions never fail.
 They are new every morning;
   great is your faithfulness.
 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
   therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:22-24 (New International Version, ©2010)

I see in this verse that God truly started the “One day at a time” movement long before Bill W. came up with it. We wait on His compassions and healing for our families! 

 Another version that might help:



 I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,
   the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.
I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—
   the feeling of hitting the bottom.
But there's one other thing I remember,
   and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:

 God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
   his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
   How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
   He's all I've got left.

 God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,
   to the woman who diligently seeks.
It's a good thing to quietly hope,
   quietly hope for help from God.
It's a good thing when you're young
   to stick it out through the hard times.

When life is heavy and hard to take,
   go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don't ask questions:
   Wait for hope to appear.
Don't run from trouble. Take it full-face.
   The "worst" is never the worst.

 Why? Because the Master won't ever
   walk out and fail to return.

Lamentations 3:19-33 (The Message)

We have a faithful God to whom we can trust our family’s problems and issues.

Please send your prayer requests to the Somebody's Mother Online Prayer Support Group:)
https://www.facebook.com/groups/119408188089314/?id=281112801918851

God’s Waiting Room

Because I am seeing so many mothers hurting, I’m posting a story I wrote back when my oldest daughter was in the midst of her addiction. I am proud to say she is nearly 3 years sober now and is working on making the rest of her life count, helping others along the way.


God’s Waiting Room

I’ll never forget the day my friend called me “the mother of dreams.” We were talking on the phone at that time. I was discouraged; she was cheering me up. She meant it in a special way, as if I was the mother of her dreams, a prayer warrior, faithful and kind. Yet I, knowing myself as I do, struggling at times to just keep my sanity, heard it as what I truly am, a “mother who dreams.”


I dream of the day when my daughter will be whole and not have to depend on illegal drugs to get through the day. I dream of sanity in our lives instead of chaos. I dream of peace and right standing with God for all my children and grandchildren. I dream of testimonies given of overcoming by God’s grace and the mercy He lavishes upon us each day. I dream of happiness, wholeness and health. I dream of restored relationships. I dream of learning to go down a different path and being happy to stay on it, instead of falling in the dark pits of familiarity. And I dream of the day that all my children will be taught of the Lord, and great will be the peace of my children.


“Then you will know that I am the LORD those who hope in me will not be disappointed."


Isaiah 49:23;


Yet amidst these dreams, as we are waiting, we often feel disappointed. Is it wrong to feel disappointed with God? Philip Yancey wrote a whole book on the subject. “Disappointment With God,” tells many stories of real people going through literal “hell on earth” and realistically examines their plights and questions. I would recommend this book and also his book “Searching For an Invisible God,” if you have ever felt like you don’t understand the ways of the Lord.


What I want to do now is to remind us to hope in God. I have started researching the word “hope” as found in the Bible. If you are in “God’s Waiting Room” you are probably in need of encouragement, and the word of God is the greatest encouragement I know of. Even a study on the book of Job will bring hope when we see the restoration at the end.


But so many of us in “God’s waiting room” may feel as though we have been forgotten, as so often happens at a doctor’s office. We may see people who came in after us, go in first, or when we finally get in to the inner examining room we still find ourselves waiting. We have been stripped down, perhaps cold and frightened about what the doctor is going to say or do, and worrying. I don’t know about you, but I find that a very frustrating experience.


For the Christian there are no guarantees on the outcome of a situation. As noted in Hebrews 11 the great faith chapter we don’t all see the conclusion of the things God has planted in our hearts. But we can still look with hope for the promise.


The book of Hebrews starts off with hope:


Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for. Hebrews 11:1

Yet even as I speak this word of encouragement I know that many of you have lost hope in your child, in your life even in your future. It is hard to hope in what you cannot see. But just take it a step at a time, a day at a time, even a moment at a time. Pray for the strength to just do the next thing that needs to be done. It may have nothing to do with the child that has gone astray. The next thing you may need to do is learn to take care of yourself. Maybe you have beat yourself up with guilt over the things you think you should’ve done or could’ve done that you are walking weary and wounded. Learn to be good to yourself. Treat yourself well. The commandment about loving your neighbor as you love yourself---you would be kind to a neighbor, so kindly take care of yourself and those that are right before you.


There are some of you in whom the Lord would say, “the world was not worthy of them.” He would say to you that He has seen your walk of faith through the pain of living in this world. He knows you are not perfect in your endeavors but He knows you have tried. He knows you love your child, and you, His child, are loved by Him with an everlasting love. He sees the big picture that we cannot see. He loves your child more than you can ever imagine, although as a parent yourself, you feel that no one could match the love you feel. He will draw a hurting parent close. He does not forget your labor of love towards your child and to Him your heavenly Father. The sacrifice of praise while we are in God’s waiting room is of great value to Him. You cannot change anyone but yourself. And only God can change a heart bent on going its own way.

Donna Collins Tinsley
If it costs you nothing, it's worth nothing! Endurance is the price tag of achievement. Listen, "We pray that you'll have the strength...not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the...strength God gives...that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy" (Col 1:11 The Message).